I’m a castration junkie. I love removing worthless balls. Sometimes, I even take a little extra if you know what I mean! I’ve been schooling other sick bitches in junk removal too. You would be surprised to know just how many women out there literally have their husbands’ balls in a jar next to the bed. Personally, I think castration is the best cure for a cheating husband. No second chances. No therapy. No costly divorce that could leave a woman broke. Just cut their balls off and he will never be a cheating bastard again.
I remove junk for lots of reasons. Some ass hats are too dumb to procreate. Some guys can’t be trusted with their cock and balls. Some think they are god’s gift to women but can’t find a clit with Mapquest. Others have little pinky dicks and I’m helping them make their package look bigger by lobbing off their big hairy testicles. And other dudes are just worthless pieces of shit that don’t deserve pleasure let alone life.
I helped a woman this weekend with junk removal from the ass wipe that put a roofie in her drink last month. She heard of my reputation; hired me to extract a little old school vengeance. I agreed of course. I will remove the whole fucking package for a cocktail. She told me enough about the dude that I knew how to set him up. Met him in a bar, gave him every chance to spike my drink, then switched them when he wasn’t looking so he got the roofie. Why do guys think every chick is a dumb bitch? Well when he woke up strapped to his bed looking at his last victim and the one who just got away, he knew he was the dumb bitch.
Lilly held up the knife and I stuck a little vibe up his ass to get it hard. He was screaming and pleading and apologizing. Even said he would turn himself into the police. Guys will say anything to keep their junk, then go right back to the behavior that got them in trouble in the first place. “The best way to ensure you won’t force yourself on women again, is permanent junk removal,” I said. Lilly put the serrated blade against the base of his worthless pecker, while I had the jaws of life on his balls to bust them.
With devilish glee, I counted, “1,2, 3.” Then it was total carnage. She sliced his pecker off as I crushed his balls. There was a lot more blood than I imagined. Lilly was in awe, not grossed out one bit. She is a natural. We left him there to bleed. I shoved his cock in his mouth as a special touch. He was clearly married by the pictures adorning his wall. I just did his wife a solid. I am sure she would thank me if she was there. I likely did what she has wanted to for years.
I’m a sick bitch who loves blood. I could blow smoke up your ass and tell you I am some philanthropic bad ass who snuffs, maims and tortures to weed out the fucktards in this world, but the truth is, I love to kill and inflict pain. And, I love to make a buck. So, I will be your twisted accomplice for a simple bourbon on the rocks. Let the games begin.
