Tormented Thoughts

torture phone sex marleyThey cut me loose in the wild today. I have no idea where I am, or how far off my plotted course for cross-country hiking. What I do know is that I have begun to feel these yearnings. Scary yearnings that seem like they would bring such utter bliss. I can literally imagine me cutting into my belly, running my fingers through it, and smearing the blood across my chest and face. I can imagine driving a corkscrew into my thigh and leaving it there until it stopped bleeding before removing it again. The images of me covered in my own blood frighten and excite me. I can feel my muff getting sloppy wet with the thought of my own blood drying slowly on my skin, like a body mask at a fancy spa. And, the scariest part of all, I’m kind of hoping another sadistic family will find me, take me in, and keep me until either they kill me or I kill them with all the bloody love we could share. My thoughts are scaring me today, will you help me?

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