I am excited about Thanksgiving. It will be a snuff phone sex Thanksgiving. I believe in not just hunting for the thrill. I eat what I kill like other responsible hunters. Some people think the world is over populated with deer. I think the world is overpopulated with stupidity. I have been hunting my dinner the past few days. I have a big fat bird named Karen in the basement. She is still fresh. I won’t cook her until Thursday. I have captured a nice companion too. He will make an excellent gravy. The key to a good Thanksgiving meal is patience. I don’t just shoot the first deer I see. I look for one with some meat on its bones. One that looks healthy and not artificial. It is the key to taste. My turkeys are stuffed with the best seasonings too. I make a vegetable stuffing to compliment the meat. Butter is also key. I melt a gallon of butter and soak my catch. The butter makes the skin so soft and tender. Add some pineapple juice and you have one yummy meal. I’m having some close friends over this holiday who have particular tastes. I am a good cook. I have been hunting and killing my holiday meals for a decade now. I have only improved my big game cooking skills. I am not a trophy hunter. You will not see heads on my wall. I carefully prepare my meat and I use all the parts. I grind the bones and innards up for protein shakes. I use the limbs for my own kind of deer sausage. I get to rid the world of drunk fools and tools and serve a fine meal. I have my pretty bird naked soaking in a big pan of seasoned butter as I write. She is going to taste as good as she smells. Who is hungry?
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