I have a new accomplice, Rick, who is helping me better appreciate my victims. See, it is wasteful to just dump their bodies in some swallow grave or in the woods for the wild animals. I can use their flesh to feed myself and my friends. Turns out human flesh is quite tasty, not to mention nourishing. My new friend taught me all about the choice cuts, how to properly season my dinner and how to plump it up to make it more delectable. I am in an apprentice stage, still learning, but in the spirit of learning, I kidnapped a young couple at the mall. Well not so much kidnapped as duped into thinking they were going to have a threesome with me. Well it’s more like an orgy, an orgy of flesh. They would be joining me and my friends for dinner.
I slipped them some roofies in their wine, then practiced my culinary skills. I want to impress Rick. I made sure the couple I selected was in good health and meaty. I then prepared a good sauce. I made this pineapple sauce that I found online often used for roasting pigs. I bound their legs and hands, put an apple in their mouth, some stuffing in their holes, and basted them in my tangy pineapple sauce. I put them in the oven mixed with some potatoes and veggies and slow roasted them. I have to admit the smell was intoxicating. Of course they woke up and started screaming. I just looked at them through the glass and watched them slowly cook to death with a smile on my face. I can’t wait to have Rick come over to share the dinner I made for him.
I’m gonna be practicing for awhile now as I want to have a special Thanksgiving dinner for all my friends. I am harvesting organs for then too. I’m curious about the different flavors and aromas of the heart, the kidneys, the lungs, the brain, the sex organs….I’m no Hannibal Lector, yet, but I am looking forward to having folks for dinner. Join me? Human flesh is an acquired taste, but it is so much fun acquiring it.
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