Snuff porn is what gets me off. The bloodier, the better. The homemade snuff porn torture death variety is my favorite. I guess you could say that when it comes to my own snuff movies, I like to go medieval. If you are a fan of torture sex, like I am, then you know that in the Game of Thrones era death and dismemberment were extra violent, extra gruesome, extra painful, and very deadly. In other words, awesome.
I have had my eye on new neighbors. Annoying fuckers who violate every code of decency. Their lawn looks like a Griswold Christmas year round; they blare country music at all hours of the night; their junker Ford pickup truck leaves toxic fumes for days and they are meth heads so tweakers in and out 24/7. No one wants them in our little community, but no one has the balls to do anything about it. We all know I have bigger balls than an elephant. Normally, I don’t hunt or kill in my back yard, but pretty certain if I got caught, my neighbors would high five me rather than turn me in. Sometimes bitches just have to die.
These ass hats were worthy of a slow tortuous death. I was inspired by watching some vintage medieval porn with religious under tones. Decided to make the crime scene look rather frantic and religious. I walked right into their home early one morning and found them making crystal meth in the kitchen. Stupid cunt was pregnant too. High as a kite, so easy to control. Tied the bitch to her dining room table spread eagle. Took an old huge ass crucifix, fucked her cunt until her insides started to spill out. Left her breathing so she could watch me sodomize her man from Deliverance baby daddy with that same crucifix. I enjoyed torturing their worthless fuck holes. Neither had the right to procreate.
After about an hour of playtime for me, I broke out my medieval sword and beheaded them. I started with him. Blood spurted out the neck stump and his head rolled off the table with his eyes wide open. Perfect. He could watch me behead his skank ass wife, who was likely his first cousin too. Their heads ended up smacking against each other. I may have played a little soccer for shits and giggles while the blood poured from their lifeless bodies. Oh, and I may have filmed it. Turns out, I enjoy killing inbred redneck tweakers. It is very satisfying to rid the world of useless fucks. I confused the crime scene with equal parts religious fanaticism and drug war gone bad. It will be unsolvable like all my kills. It will also be coming to the world of underground 8 MM films very soon. Maybe they can repay me in death for exposing me to “Drunk on a Plane” at 3 am every morning. In hindsight, I didn’t torture them enough.