I’ve become fascinated with power tools lately. From electric screwdrivers to electric saw blades, I’ve fallen in love. There’s something fascinating about having a machine with so much power. Unlike a blade, it wrecks havoc in the process of mutilation or even death. The blood spurts and the tissue is exposed, much like it is when I dissect bodies or prepare them as a mortician. So, I guess that you can understand my fascination now.
I went to a home improvement store; and, of course, was eagerly looking at my options. I was weighing my options carefully; for instance, battery-operated allowed for mobility, but would I be satisfied with the power? During my investigation, I had several workers and customers offer me help. They must’ve thought that I was picking out something for my husband; regardless, all of them flirted. If only they had known how I was sizing up their bodies and imaging which tool I would like to use on them! One particularly persistent worker wanted to help me; he was tall and thick, and I thought he’d be the perfect chance to try out my new toys! As he helped me out to my car, I gave him my address and knew that I would see him that night.
Sure enough, he showed up all fresh and clean, his hair slicked back and a 8-pack of beer. I invited him in; after a few beers, I couldn’t tolerate his rambling anymore. Plus, I’d decided his fate: I was going to test out the difference between the battery-operated and electric screwdriver. I already had the long, spiral attachment in both of them. Forcing him into my chair and binding him was too easy; he was drunk and kept mumbling, “kinky.” Then, came the fun: I turned on the screwdriver and watched as his eyes grew wide. What a perfect place to begin, I thought! Using both of the screwdrivers, I pressed with equal pressure…pushing them into his eye sockets. The battery-operated one seemed to lack a little bit of the speed, but it seemed to cut down on some of the mess. It would be perfect for a home invasion, I decided. Of course, my victim continued to moan; but, I was so enthralled with my toys that it was easy to ignore him.
I’m not quite sure when he took his last breath; maybe it was around the time that I was pushing the screw through his throat, entirely through his body. It was like decorating a corpse! The saw was one of my favorites…the blood gushed and pooled in the floor as I took him apart…limb by limb. Yes, he had helped me decide which tools I wanted…I wanted them all!
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