One of the more darker fantasies on my mind lately has been beheading. It’s something I fear, but I still want it. Is that weird. I guess it is, I’m just so twisted now and there’s no way to turn back. No matter how hard I try I’ll never be like I was before. Not after be exposed to so much sex and violence. Vanilla sex doesn’t do it for me anymore, but I’m not sad about it. Honestly, I don’t even miss it.
In my fantasy a very strong man is torturing me hours. Cutting into my body and piercing with it needles. My body would be his pin cushion and I think it’d be even sexier if he did medical experiments on me too! Before my head is severed from my body I want to be completely red with blood. I want him to remove my head and hold it front of my broken body so I see it in my final moments. It would be perfect if there were a mirror in the room too because I want to see what my severed head looked like actually.
The idea of my torture and death is so hot. It makes my cunt dripping wet just thinking about it, but it can only happen once. Wouldn’t it be great if I just die over and over again? That’s what I really want, but sadly it isn’t possible and it will never be possible. Although knowing that I only have one death makes it more dangerous. If something goes wrong I’ll never have the chance to do it again. Maybe it’s sick of me to think this, but I think that’s incredibly intimate. It’s the most private and precious thing you can give someone because you only have one life and one death.