I have always fantasized about being a victim. I have watched countless scary movies and every single time I have seen a character running for their lives, I get this adrenaline rush. Something about the chase gets me so turned on. Seeing your self beg for your life and having no control while someone does anything they want to you is just incredible. I have always wanted someone to come in through the window at night, forcing me to do what ever they pleased. It makes me so wet thinking about a person just taking advantage of me and having no way of escaping from that situation. For instance I would want a stranger to tie my hands together and force me to suck their hard cock for as long as they wanted. Beating me with their fist until I was just a bloody mess. I would want my holes to be violated filled with cum or urine or what ever my attacker deemed necessary. I want to feel alive for those seconds where he looks into my eyes while he strangles me until I’m unconscious. Feeling my life slip away while not being able to do a single thing about it. My fantasies are not crazy or stupid they are what make me feel alive! I long for that one person who has an inner monster in them to teach me the value of life. But I just beg that he uses his cock and his sharp blade to torture me. I want to bleed and suffer and loose all control . My question is where is this monster that I seek?