October is my favorite month. Why? Because freaks like me blend in with the natives. During the month of horror and terror, knife wielding psychotics like me are actually celebrated. Knives, hooks, scissors, axes, metal fingers….. are all thought cool. See silly people think Michael Meyers, Jason Voorhes and Freddy Krueger aren’t real. But there are knife loving socio paths like me whose heroes come straight off the celluloid screen. Every day in October, I butcher someone in the fashion of one of my idols. I have never been caught. Variety and seemingly random victims are the keys to not being caught.
How would you like to be butchered?
By a psychopathic wooden puppet named Blade with a knife? By a sweet camper girl named Angela, wielding a big ole butcher knife? Victor Crowley style with a hatchet? Vengeful fisherman style with a rusty old hook? Or maybe you prefer your hook Candyman style with the added benefit of a swarm of bees to sting you to death? Then there are your garden variety crazed killers fond of basic kitchen cutlery like Ghostface , Jack Torrence, Chucky, Dexter or Patrick Bateman? Lizzy Borden style with 50 whacks? Jason style with a menacing machete? Maybe you have mommy issues and would like to be butchered Norman Bates style? Freddy Krueger style with sharp metal fingers? Hell, I will even go all Fatal Attraction on your ass and kill you and your bunny. My favorite way to butcher is Michael Myers style. Big fucking sharp knife, cold dark stare, never say a word. Just butcher you and move on to the next victim.The possibilities are endless when you have a knife loving serial killer groupie like me. My only MO is that I use a sharp instrument. I love slicing, cutting and mutilating flesh. Such a turn on to watch a worthless POS bleed. I can imitate any one of my many knife wielding idols.
Indeed October is my favorite month. Tomorrow the games begin. Maybe you will survive, maybe you won’t. But you will bleed, a lot.