I was craving some long pork, something young and tender and sweet so I went out hunting late last night to find some. I went to the college here in town where all the young people were out drinking with their friends when I came across one very drunk freshman half passed out on a park bench all by herself. This is a good lesson on why you should never go out drinking alone like that, I just helped her up and led her to my car and she was too drunk to protest or even realize what was going on! Honestly, she deserved her fate just for being so stupid! I brought her back to my place and cleaned her up, thoroughly washing her entire body and shaving off all that hair before liberally coating her skin with olive oil and spices. Then I popped her in my giant oven and started roasting her. She didn’t even wake up until she was locked in the oven and starting to cook but by then it was far too late for her. In the end she was delicious tho, would you like a taste?
Ava
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