The subconscious is a wonderful play ground. It stores hopes, fears, irrationalities, then when you least expect it, it brings them up as you sleep. I remember growing up next door to a family that were overly friendly. They wouldn’t let their insanely happy future pole riders play with me, but nobody left their offspring play with me. The middle one, he would get picked on all the time. He wouldn’t talk, but he would whisper things all the time. It didn’t bother me at all, because we all know that Ruby Girl always whispered to me.
One day his Mom was drinking coffee in the kitchen with my Mom and she was telling my Mom that she was scared for him. This peaked my interest. I walked softly to the door and heard her say that he had stopped going outside because he was deathly afraid of bugs, and if he saw one he would start to scream and flail around violently. I didn’t know what flail meant, but I guessed that it was something weird and scarey.
It took me three days of being ‘nice’ to get the neighbor’s daughter, who was around my age to invite me over to play in the yard. I could see him looking at us outside. I told his sister that I had made him a card to make him feel better. I asked if she could give it to him. She ran upstairs and I saw her hand it to him. He placed it down on the window sill and walked away. That stupid bastard! I wanted to see what would happen.
A few nights later my Mom came flying into my room. She was yelling about how evil I was, and how terrible I was. I had my hand under my pillow touching Ruby Girl’s hand. I didn’t flinch, I didn’t back up, I just laid there as she told me how horrible I was. Big deal. She finally sat down on my bed and looked at me for a few seconds. She leaned in and told me that she didn’t understand me, and what I did to the neighbor boy was one of the worst things anyone could ever do. I asked her what she was talking about.
She said that the card that I made the boy wasn’t nice. I tried not to smile. She told me that he cannot sleep because now of the bugs that fell out of the card I made him and they crawled away. Now he thinks there are a ton of bugs in the walls and keeps having nightmares. I heard Ruby Girl giggle.
I often wonder about him, they moved a few weeks later. I hope he thinks of me, I hope those bugs still slither and crawl into the walls of his subconscious so that he can have sweet terrifying dreams of them as he lays sleeping.
Raven
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