It was a dark and dreary night. My car broke down on the side of the road and I started walking along the highway. It was raining and I was cold, so I broke my rule of never taking rides from strangers. But it was an older man, his wife and their college age daughters. They introduced themselves as Rick and Pandora Martin. I was a bit desperate so I got in the back. They said they would drive me to their house so I could call AAA and wait out the storm. They lived just around the corner. Safe enough. So I thought.
Pandora pours me a drink and then excuses herself to freshen up. I’m left in the living room with Rick and their daughters. Before long, I am feeling woozy. Pandora comes out and I can see she looks very different, but my eyes are starting to blur. What did I drink. She is tall, thin, beautiful, goth like in red. Not at all the housewife she was in the car. She comes over to me, kisses me, puts her finger under my chin and coyly inquires, “How are you feeling dear. You look sleepy.” The daughters are giggling like they know something is up and at that moment, a pit forms in my belly. I’m in danger, but from what exactly, I could never have fathomed.
Rick starts pinching my arms and my thighs and my ass. Although starting to slur my words, I try to say, “Stop it, I am not a piece of meat.” I hear Pandora utter coolly, “But you are Cassandra, you are.” More giggling from the daughters. It becomes obvious I have been drugged. I try to stand up, but fall to the ground. I hear all sorts of noises, laughter and Pandora and Rick talking, but I can’t really make anything out. I try to plead with them, but I am sure my speech is incoherent at this point.
Next thing I know, Rick is dragging me downstairs. I am being pulled down the stairs by my long blonde hair like a side of beef. The evil daughters are laughing as they follow behind me. One of them says to me, “This is how we tenderize the meat first.” What? Clearly in my drug induced state I did not hear that correctly. Was this a nightmare? Suddenly, I was propped up in some chair, the girls were binding my hands and my feet. Still sluggish I tried to ask what the fuck was going on? I looked over and on this metal table used for food preparation in restaurant kitchens, was Pandora writhing around like a cat in heat. All of sudden she is masturbating, and cumming wildly in front of me and her hubby and 2 demented daughters.
At this point, I am becoming more lucid, so I try to ask what is going on. Have I been kidnapped by The Devil’s Rejects? They just act like I am not there. Rick is now fucking Pandora on that metal table and the sisters from hell come over and start taunting me. They are saying how delicious I look, and that I better prepare myself for dinner, which is followed my an evil high pitched laugh. Then I see the life size rotisserie rod, and a big vat of chopped veggies. This couldn’t be. They couldn’t be modern day cannibals could they?
Pandora sees the horror and fear in my yes, comes over and says, “Rick, honey, I think our dinner guest gets it now.” I am not only the guest, but I am the main fucking course. Pandora and her daughters pull me up on that metal slab and begin putting all sorts of seasonings on me. One evil bitch girl shoves an apple in my mouth and tells me to oink like the pig I am. I close my eyes tight thinking I can wake myself up out of this nightmare. But when I open them, I see Rick, with a big two pronged fork. I start to wiggle and squirm in an attempt to break free, but Rick just jabs me with that sharp utensil all over my body. My body is marred by little holes. Holes now leaking blood. The girls rush over an start licking the blood slowly seeping out of me. Pandora yells at them, “Don’t ruin your dinner angels.”
I have a huge apple in my mouth, my skin is riddled with puncture wounds, my hands and feet are bound and I am covered in some sort of sweet sticky juice. I’ve been marinated and informed it is to make my skin crackle. At the moment I begin to cry hysterically, Pandora says to me, “There there sweet girl. No need to cry. You are about to do something totally selfish for others. You are going to provide my family with some much needed sustenance.” She snaps her fingers, and her girls tie me to a stick, while Rick shoves my body into the big rotisserie cage. I start praying. I can’t believe this is how my life is gonna end. It can’t end this way.
Rich and one of the girls lifts the cage from one end, while Pandora and the other daughter grabs the other end and they begin to carry me outside. I see the fire pit. I am hanging upside down, in fear and pain as they hoist this device I am in up on to two stakes. Pandora looks at me with her cold dead eyes, lights a match, licks her lips and tosses the match onto the fire pit. I can feel the flames starting to heat my flesh; I can smell the sweet and pungent mix of flesh and Hawaiian marinade; and I can see my world fading fast before me. And, I can feel the horrible pain of having an electric rod thrust through my body.
My flesh is charring fast, the pain imaginable. I’m laying over the heat, being turned by the daughters. I can hear my skin crackling, melting, singing, falling off my bones…The last thing I hear is Pandora’s declaration, “You are just a piece of meat young lady, and we plan to eat you as such.”
I have so many lovely little items around my house that keep it nice and cozy. Things like my hand collection. Hands that I have severed from victims and placed in ant hills until the flesh is completely devoured by my little insect friends so that I can keep the skeletal remains forever. Or the beautiful lamps that I make that are lit and have severed body parts floating inside them. Or my wall of heads, skulls from previous victims that have been picked clean just like the hands and placed on display .I have always cherished my little chachkies and have kept them all to myself. However recently a very nosy, very annoying family has moved into the neighborhood. I decided it was time to teach them a lesson. I know it won’t take me any time at all to scare these fuckers right out of their house. Last night I put my plan in motion. I took one of my least favorite hands and slipped into their home while they slept. I placed it in the kitchen, in the garbage disposal so that in the morning they would find it. I plan to bury a skull next to the front walk tonight with the crown sticking out of the ground. Next they will find a beheaded chicken on the back porch. Things will gradually get worse until the final nail in the coffin. A black cat that I killed yesterday. I gutted it and shaved an inverted cross into it’s fur between it’s eyes. This wonderful trinket will be left in their bed while they are at work. Under the covers so that they don’t find it until they turn in for the night. I can keep this up for ever if I have to, but I believe after a few weeks of little surprises they will be more then ready to pack.
